OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
