roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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