your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i will never coherently bang her
only you would photoshop your dick
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
She tied me up with her honor cords...
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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