The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
