I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
