I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
