i barfeds in our rink
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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