she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
