I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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