Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
