Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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