dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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