She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
