Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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