my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
