I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
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