I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
The ass gains better be worth it
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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