He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
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