hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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