Texts From Last Night

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  (281): View more from Texas

  How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend

  (936): View more from Texas

  Get a boyfriend

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  (281): How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend (936): Get a boyfriend http://tfl.nu/1049
  Replies (3) Good night (653) Bad night (968)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I swear she didn't look like that last week.

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  (214): I swear she didn't look like that last week. http://tfl.nu/zofc
  Replies (2) Good night (674) Bad night (2494)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.

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  (469): Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option. http://tfl.nu/owbc
  Replies (10) Good night (2751) Bad night (734)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.

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  (203): When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you. http://tfl.nu/1g0q
  Replies (5) Good night (793) Bad night (2742)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over

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  (718): all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over http://tfl.nu/ocfj
  Replies (14) Good night (7407) Bad night (1066)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.

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  (765): I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work. http://tfl.nu/q42i
  Replies (33) Good night (5912) Bad night (2928)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far

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  (609): We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far http://tfl.nu/58dc
  Replies (11) Good night (5782) Bad night (1219)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.

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  (519): you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner. http://tfl.nu/pwti
  Replies (7) Good night (3528) Bad night (738)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me

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  (+44): Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me http://tfl.nu/dbfn
  Replies (9) Good night (1069) Bad night (4188)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher

  (312): View more from Illinois

  And maybe a life coach?

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  (303): So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher (312): And maybe a life coach? http://tfl.nu/dluc
  Replies (2) Good night (2134) Bad night (645)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.

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  (603): Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear. http://tfl.nu/x2nz
  Replies (6) Good night (1571) Bad night (460)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'

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  (210): You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive' http://tfl.nu/9ya7
  Replies (4) Good night (1387) Bad night (498)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid

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  (406): Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid http://tfl.nu/t6fb
  Replies (8) Good night (1652) Bad night (485)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window

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  (954): I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window http://tfl.nu/x5q3
  Replies (4) Good night (878) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...

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  (303): Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching... http://tfl.nu/8tua
  Replies (4) Good night (370) Bad night (632)

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