I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
