The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
