Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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