I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
