I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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