the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
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