fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize