she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Randomize
