yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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