Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
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