There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Terrible idea I love it
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
