just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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