Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
