Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
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You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
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We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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