I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
His nipple licking is glorious
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