Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
