He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
