So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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