I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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