She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
