You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
