Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
should my penis look like a turkey
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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