i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
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i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
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I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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