i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
