dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize