Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize