Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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