How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Randomize
