lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
We left an ass print on the piano.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
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