idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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